How do you move forward when your life goes up in flames?
Hello beautiful people! I am back, and I have missed you all so much. There has been so much going on in my life I don’t even know where to start or finish. Life has been such a roller coaster, but before we lay it all out on the table to try to figure out how we would move forward from the hard situations that we really don’t want to talk about. In all honesty we might not even want to remember the trauma that we go through.
I would first like to Welcome all our new readers here, and welcome back all my faithful readers. Now you all know if I do not post for a while then you know something big is happening in my life. On the other hand, at this moment, it isn’t about me it’s about you and how you have been since we last talked. For all our new readers, this is the routine that we do to release all the stress, acheivements, and obstacles that you have been able to over-come through-out the entire week. For some people this may be the only time they have to unload all the experiences that you have had this week. Now is the time to let it out, all the good, and all the bad. Be thankful and grateful to be able to wake up another day and have life breathed into you.
Now that you all have given yourself credit for all the small wins that you made this week and released all the stress lets dive right into this blog entry for the week. The long awaited and anticipated blog entry has officially begun. I’m not sure if you all follow me on my other social media platforms like, Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook, then you may already know exactly what I am about to tell you. If not, then this is all new information for you that you may feel very intrigued by. Maybe some of you have been through this so this topic will hit close to home. Even if you haven’t gone through this same situation specifically but all the emotions of a loss are still the same. So, now let’s dive into flames.
Almost two weeks ago, it’ll be two weeks on March 7. In the early morning on February 21st , 2021 around 2:30/3:00 that morning my niece who had just turned 7 only 2 days ago woke up from her sleep to use the bathroom downstairs. As she made her way downstairs, she discovered a fire growing from the couch. At that moment she ran back upstairs with my nephew, her brother to wake up her mother who was sleeping like me. From that point on there was a lot of screaming happening to try to wake me up. I was sleep in my room with the door locked. Normally I am a very hard sleeper; there is even a video that my friends have of them throwing a dog at me as I was sleeping, and I did not wake up.
So, knowing this information…the fact that I popped up from my sleep like a daisy rising from the ground still shocks me to my core. I wrapped my blanket around me and then ran downstairs. As I am running down the stairs, I felt a strange strong wave of heat. I didn’t even run to the bottom of the stairs; I turned my head to the right and saw that the arm rest of the couch was being engulfed in flames. I sprinted back up the stairs put on clothes shoes and a jacket. Then I ran back down the steps to make sure that we got out in time. As soon as we were outside the house, I called 911 because my sister left her phone in the house. After 10 minuets they still weren’t at the house yet. What’s crazier is that the fire department is right across the street from where my sister’s house is.
By that time the fire was no longer the couch but had not only engulfed the entire living room but had spread to the other areas of the house. It got so bad to the point the pressure from the flames began to break the windows and burn the door from the inside. All you saw was a huge black mushroom cloud leave from the house. At this point the fire department still hadn’t shown up, and now not only did we have to worry about our house but others as well. The fire had gotten so big to the point it was about to set the house next to ours on fire as well. At that point my sister started running towards the fire, at that moment I didn’t know where she was going so, I did what any sister would and held her back. Next thing I knew, a man who lived across the street came running and knocked on the next-door neighbor’s house door.
By that point I had called 911 again because like I said the fire was getting worse. By the time the family in the house next to ours was walking out was the same time that the fire department pulled up. In that moment all I could think about was not my stuff that was going to be destroyed but my niece and nephew who just had a birthday passed. All of their stuff was getting destroyed. All of my sister’s belongings, her home was going up in flames. They say that we should be happy that we all made it out alive and didn’t lose anyone to the fire, but that doesn’t mean there was still no loss.
To lose something or someone is a very hard situation to go through. No matter who you are or what you lose. Whether it was a break-up, death, fire, or accident to be at a loss is a pain that no one can every prepare for no matter how much they try. Now in this certain situation not only have I pushed my emotions to side to be able to be there for my sister, niece, and nephew but in a sense, it seems like everyone else has to. Now, that may be because everyone sees me as a strong black woman, but does that also mean that strong woman can’t or don’t feel pain. Does me being a tall woman equate to me always being okay no matter what may come at me in life. Haven’t you heard check on your strong friends? We may not show our paint on our face, we may not be able to express how broken we feel, we may not physically show that we are bleeding on the inside, but there is something that is making it hard to do so. There is something telling us even if we did say it who would care, because we are always seen as strong. Or we just no longer know how to cry, or express these feelings of pain, all we know is how to suppress to make it the next day.
So regardless which end of which end of the spectrum you are on the bottom line now is how can we move forward from loss. How do we wake up each and every day to keep moving forward? How do I rebuild everything that has just went up in flames? At first you will spend your time most likely pondering these questions trying to figure this out. You will probably want to drown yourself in a few drinks to take the edge off to make it easier. You might want to smoke, to take the stress off your shoulders to be able to relax easier. Shoot! You might feel like you want to run away from all the stress and burdens you are feeling.
If you are feeling these things know that it’s okay, and that it’s normal to feel these types of emotions. These are normal emotions that everyone feels so now that those thoughts are on the right path. Don’t let your emotions and stress overwhelm you and engulf you like flames.
I know this will be hard and I am sure that this thought will be one that you really don’t want to admit to. The fact might be that this is a clean slate for you to start over the way that you have always wanted. To do all the things this that you told yourself that you couldn’t do. Maybe this is the universe making you grow your confidence and take the leap towards your goals that you have been hesitating on. Now this isn’t something that you will realize overnight, this will take lot of internal searching. Trust me it won’t easy, and it trust me it will be painful as well, but when you come out on the other end you will know a part of yourself that you never realized existed.
I just want to say thank you for coming and hanging out with me on this beautiful Friday. I hope that you stride into this new day ready for all the blessings the universe has waiting for you. Yes, we may have loss something but, in the end, we know that whatever is lost wasn’t meant to stay and the real treasures we deserve in life are on the way. I love you all, and I will talk to you guys next week.
See you later !
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