Rising from the rubble like a phoenix!
We are back, and I know that I told you all a couple weeks ago that I wanted to come up with a name to call all of my amazing supporters. I finally think I have come to decision; I will now refer to you all my “MiBuds.” To give you a better explanation of what a “MiBud” is lets first break down the word. I coined the term when I was on my Bigo Live account trying to come up with a name for my fan base on the app. I didn’t want to have thousands of different names for my fan base, and supporters. In my brain the thought was very tacky, so I worked hard to trying to come up with a term, that not only meant a lot to me but also could resonate with the souls of my fan base. Now, that you know the setting I was in when I coined this term, we can now dissect the two words so that you will know the true meaning.
Let’s start off with the first part or syllable in the word which is “Mi” which basically is another term for my, or if you want to think of it in a personal way; I wanted all of you to feel connected to the others in the group. So, not only me will you be able to feel connected to me but also to the other members; “Mi” stands for you and me. Now, as we look at the term “Buds”, I thought of this in a very literal since. A bud is the beginning stage of becoming flower. The reason I chose this word, is well in my opinion I think it’s rather literal. You all have gathered from different places all over the world in one garden, not only to read, but to feed your soul through the art that I produce. I am feeding, watering, and helping not only myself but you as well move forward in life. Regardless if it is big or small, there are and has been steps being taken to become the person that you have always wanted to be. In the end that is the thought process that I went through when coming up with the name I will be calling you all.
I hope that this will make you all feel even more loved that normal. I do think about you all a lot and how I can create better content to be able to connect with you all. Lets’ dig right into today’s blog entry. Before that can happen you already know what we are about to do first. But before we dig into that let me first welcome all the new readers here and thank all of the “MiBuds” for continuously supporting me. Now, getting back to our regularly scheduled programming. I want you all to tell yourself all the things that you have been able to accomplish this week. It could be as simple as getting out of the bed and getting ready for the day, when you have been feeling like you are slipping back into that dark place. Or you may have been able to complete a project that you’ve been working on. Regardless of the achievement being big or small you have been able to continuously move forward and you even made it to my blog entry. That takes the willingness to move forward to become the best person you are striving to become. Give yourself the pat on the back that you deserve, you have made it through a lot and deserve to give yourself praise. Feel yourself with love and feed your soul, so that you don’t have to go searching other places for it.
Wow, you guys we have really dug deep within ourselves this Friday, and I love how we have been able to connect our hearts and souls through words. Since the introductions are complete lets’ dig into the real reason we are here today. On this fabulous, cloudy Friday, I wanted to talk to you all about building life from the rubble and rising again like a phoenix. As you all know these past few months have been hard for me. It seems as though each time I let you all know that everything is okay, something else happens for me to be able to grow as person. Now, for me to be able to say that in this moment is growth. If I would have tried to say that all of the pain and experiences that has happened in my life is growth; that slogan was actually nonexistent a few weeks ago. Regardless, as you can see, I am no longer the same person I was a few weeks ago.
It has taken me a long time to get here and trust me I am still not at the place that I want to be, but I have taken steps towards that place. The first step for me was knowing and coming to a realization that not all things in life are meant to last. They are here for a season and to be able to teach you things not only about life but also about yourself. I know that’s not an easy thing to do but I want you all to know that it is possible. It is painful and it will hurt, because you will have the question why. The thing is in the end there is no one that can answer this question except for you. Only you know the true reason why that certain situation hurt you the way it did, or if that situation didn’t hurt you, you will come to an understanding why as well.
I ask myself why all the time. Why would someone who is supposed to be a grandmother kick out her grand child? Why did someone who was supposed to be the closet person to me, try to treat me as a walking mat? Why did my school wait so long to tell that I needed to complete an extra credit to receive my degree? Why did my older sisters house have to burn down?
There are so many why’s that I am yearning to know, but in the end the real question is why all of these experiences made me wonder why. Did I except something of someone that I know can’t give what they don’t know how to give. Did I expect this person not to treat me like this when the signs where there that things had started to turn toxic? Did I assume that my degree was just coming, because I was told it was by someone in a department, but I never got in touch with a higher up? Why did the fire effect, me so much? Do you see how I have taken the questions that could lead me on a search of trying to find answers from someone else. Now these are the questions that I have to ask myself. Now is not the time to ponder on others but to now try to grow and heal the wounds that are clearly being poked and stabbed by all of the situations that have happened in your life.
Now, as I mentioned earlier, finding the answers to these questions are not easy to find, they won’t be smooth either. It will hurt because you will wonder why do these words hurt, to hear? Why did my mood change as soon as I tried to dig deeper within myself? Are there things that I have not healed from that still triggers me. Whether that be subtle or overtly obvious, but in the end, there is a sour feeling that you get during these situations. Take it one day at a time, one hole at a time. You must take time to find yourself.
Yes! The life may have come at you fast and you couldn’t control the momentum and trajectory of how it happened. Do you know what you can control though? Whether you will stay down and wallow in the darkness and pain that you go through in life. Whether you will let the pain from the situations push you over the edge and off the cliff. Or will you get back up, whether or not you trip up when you do get. What matters is that you keep going each time you do fall. Whoever promised us that life would be easy and piece of cake? Where did we get the notion that we wouldn’t have to go through pain in order to grow?
There is a famous quote that says, in order to grow, flourish, and become the person that you have aspired to be you must first become uncomfortable within your current situation in your life. If you are not uncomfortable how will you know that this current situation isn’t what you want in life. You start to become more content within your life, and start to think that your current surroundings are the ones we have to stay in.
I want you all to know that you don’t have to stay there. You don’t have to continue to dwell in the darkness and hurt that you are holding onto. You don’t have to continuously relive and harbor all those same emotions that you lived through in the past. Know that you don’t have to bring that into the present moment, you can rise from the ashes and begin again. You are in a new moment, in a new time, a new day full of brand-new opportunities to be able to stride towards the life that you want for yourself. You have the chance and opportunity to begin your process to heal. It will not do anything for you keep reminiscing the pain but to learn from it to make sure in the future it won’t happen again.
Wow, you guys that just felt great to talk about. I Hope that you all felt great reading it. I am not sure how many of you all it will resonate with, but I hope that it will be able to help at least one person. Or it could be the thing that may be able to help you in the future.
Thanks for coming and hanging out with me again MiBuds. I hope that you all stride into this Friday ready for the change that is coming your way. There are blessings on the way, there will be healing in our life. As long as we continue to push forward better days will surely come and by the end, you will realize that you have become the person that you have always wanted to be.
I love you MiBuds and I will see you all next week!
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